that of pure light
by festiveruin
Summary: Byleth sits with Dimitri on bad days. Today was one of those days.


While Dimitri had mostly come back to the realm of sanity (sometimes it only seemed like he was trying but failing but that's all anyone could ask of him; as long as he continued trying, it was fine as far as Byleth was concerned) and no longer spent all of his time brooding in the cathedral, his bad days weren't infrequent and they were obvious to most. He would withdraw and keep himself as isolated as possible. People got the hint and left him alone, but Byleth continued to check on him, as she always did. It had become habit over the months and was in her routine now. He never turned her away, and sometimes, he would greet her with a silent look of relief, as if he hadn't seen her in years. She couldn't stop checking on him after the first time she saw that look on his face. They rarely ever spoke on those days, but Byleth liked it that way. Talking had never been her forte.

Today was such a day.

Byleth was reading a report that Gilbert had given her the day before and only now had the opportunity to go through. Dimitri had opted to sit next to her, rather closely. Their shoulders brushed against each other when she moved, and she could see him staring at her with a strange look on his face from the corner of her eye. It unnerved her a bit, but opted to not remark on it.

The sunlight streamed in from the broken stained glass, a rather ironic visual representation of its most common resident. The warm months were nearing but after they left Garreg Mach, things would only get colder since the trip to Fhirdiad would involve the northernmost regions. Byleth was planning on appreciating the warmth as much as she still could.

Unexpectedly, Dimitri spoke. "The dead don't bother me as much in the cathedral," he said. "I try to pray to the Goddess. I ask her to make them stop so I may be permitted a moment of peace."

Byleth paused, and turned to look at him. He looked tired. She'd need to convince him to sleep early tonight. He'd been much more compliant with her the past few weeks.

"Does she answer you?" Followers of the Church prayed to Seiros. Rhea had told her that Sothis was another name for Seiros, so he was praying to a being that no longer existed. But if it helped, he didn't need to know that. Especially now. Not today.

"Usually not," he admitted. "But I feel as though she has today."

He was staring at her again. Different than polite eye contact and was quickly becoming uncomfortable.

She shifted her away from him, feeling self-conscious. Did she look bedraggled? She'd slept the night before, for once, but she hadn't done much with her hair that morning. She'd only run her fingers through it once or twice. Was it so noticeable?

"I'm glad," she said, remembering herself and absently scratching the course paper with her thumb nail.

She still felt his gaze on her and she swallowed. "Do I look unpresentable?" She said abruptly, turning to look at him again.

He blinked looking like he'd been snapped out of a daze. "What?" He said. "You look—you look lovely. As you always do."

"That wasn't what I meant," she said, ignoring the unexpected flattery and the strange feeling in her stomach that resulted from it. "You were staring at me. I thought that there was something wrong with my appearance."

To her surprise, he blushed and stammered out an apology before looking pointedly away from her. Specifically avoiding her gaze was nearly as bad as staring, but she didn't want to prolong his apparent embarrassment. Still, she came to sit with him for a reason.

"How are you feeling?"

He hesitated, but turned to her all the same. It looked like he wanted to say something to her but pursed his lips instead. "I'm feeling better than I was this morning. Thank you, Professor."

Byleth quirked a brow. "What are you thanking me for?"

He continued to surprise her with his stare taking on that soft, half-lidded look again. "For staying."

Despite herself, despite her confusion, Byleth found herself smiling. "You don't need to thank me for that."

He returned her expression, but didn't respond. For as bashful as he reacted when she caught him staring, he must have regained his nerve and continued to look at her.

Byleth found that she didn't mind it as much as she thought, content with the warm feeling in her chest.


End file.
